It's been a rough week....

Sometimes I can't believe that it's only been less than 5 months since my brother passed away. It seems like it's been so much longer than that since he was last sitting on my couch offering his brotherly advice, or telling a joke or trying to tickle Mercedes. Sometimes I miss him so much that it physically hurts me...I actually get a physical pain in my chest from missing him so much. And that is how this week has been.

I miss seeing him, talking to him, teasing him, listening to him, cooking for him, calling him, asking him for favors, doing him favors, just knowing that he was a couple doors away, needing him and him being there to be needed. I just miss him. But especially I miss talking to him. He really understood me. We were more than just brother and sister, we were great friends too. And I appreciated his perspective on things...he saw things in a way that made sense to me...in a way that I didn't always see them myself, but was always glad to be made aware of that perception. He loved to play devil's advocate. He was great at making sure that I really thought about all sides of things. I miss that. I miss so many things. I especially miss being able to give him a hug and tell him that I love him and he's a great brother.

So this week I've felt especially sad and I've had a hard time just functioning. It was kinda lucky cause Mercedes was on Easter break, so she was able to spend lots of time hanging out with her cousins and do some fun things with them. I am so lucky to live close to my family and be able to rely on them for help when I am not feeling well.

But due to the way I was feeling this week, I really didn't accomplish much. Unless you count crying and sleeping as accomplishments, then I definately didn't accomplish as much as I would have liked. I did manage to do a couple things though.

Last night though, I got the urge to do a LO. The picture isn't great since the right side is curled up a bit, but I was just in a hurry to get a picture taken so it will have to do. I wanted to do a layout about how fast Mercedes seems to be growing up, but I also mentioned a few things that she still likes to be "little" about. It was just when I saw this picture of her I just was struck with how grown up she looked and I knew that I needed to do a LO about this place she is at right now where she wants to be grown up, but there is still a part of her that likes to be little.

This was just a quickie bday card I made using some scraps that I had sitting on my desk.

This card is using stamps and paper from Close to my Heart and the actual card pattern is from the CTMH book Wishes which I just ordered and LOVE!!

Another card using CTMH products, and ideas. This card is pretty much a scraplift of one in the Spring idea book. Now I just need to make one for a boy so I'll have at least something for each in my stash!

And this is what gets me through all the hard times. My little princess! Here she is giving some love to some of her many Webkinz stuffies.

I hope these aren't too dark. I just got Photoshop Elements 8 and have been playing around with some of the actions that you can get, but sometimes I may get a little carried away...sorry?!

I think this is my favorite. I just love the expression on her face...it's a typical I'm happy and content look that she gets when she is...well, happy and content. Boy, I love this little girl! And she loves her Webkinz! lol