Still depressed, so here's just a few pics...

Well, it's been another rough week. My brother's birthday was on Wednesday and we did get together and try to celebrate it, but it was just all too obvious that he wasn't there and will never celebrate another birthday again. And he had way too many birthday's left that he should have celebrated.

But enough about that. I did manage to get a couple things done this week, although it did feel like I was forcing myself to do it, rather than actually enjoying it, but I forced myself in the hopes that something might make me feel better.

I hope this depression lifts soon or I'm not sure what to do. I am on new medication and I do have to give it time to work, but patience is NOT one of my virtues so this is a big challenge.

I did get a little mini album made using the pics of Mercedes that I took last weekend, so here it is, although I did upload it backwards. Please just bear with me.

So this is actually the back cover

Some cards I've made over the last couple weeks and finally managed to take some pics...

Photo Shoot

Depression steals my creativity...

along with my energy, motivation and general desire to do anything or be anything other than a pile of useless cells, wasting skin, taking up space on my couch, watching the minutes tick by.

And that pretty much describes what I've been doing for the last couple weeks, give or take a few minutes here and there.

Were it not for my sister, my daughter would not have been fed and cared for. And were it not for my mom, I would not have been fed and cared for, since there were literally some days that I did not even have the energy to make myself something to eat.

Thankfully on Friday I felt a teeny bit better, and had Mercedes come home and over the last couple days, I've slowly felt the desire to participate in life return at least in some form.

So I'm sorry that I haven't written much lately, but I had pulled into my shell and that was where I stayed until a couple days ago, and I am just now slowly starting to poke my head out.

So, not much more to say, just a bunch of pics of the things that keep me going.

First and Foremost, my Princess...when all else fails, she will always keep me going...we did a little photo shoot yesterday with some roses that she got from her daddy. We got a bunch of pics that I love. Here's just one of them....

This was just me fooling around with my camera and I was really happy with how this pic turned out, so I wanted to share it with you! Isn't this rose gorgeous! This is my favorite color of roses!

This was just a quickie gift tag.

The card is 3 1/2x8 and I made the envelope too.

Another 3 1/2 x 8

One of the hardest things for me when I'm depressed is going out, so it was tough to make it out to Mercedes choir concert, but it was worth it when she got this look on her face when she saw me in the audience!

Here she is singing her little heart out!

Another choir pic!

Where is spring?

Where is spring? That is the question of the week it seems? These pictures were taken at about 7:30 tonight and these are what "spring" is looking like around here right now.

It all started on Sunday evening with light flurries that never really even made it to the ground. Then during the night it got a little worse and by Monday morning there was a tiny bit of the white stuff sticking around...only enough that by starting my car 7 or 8 minutes before we had to leave for school, the defrost had taken care of everything and I didn't even have to pull out the snow brush.

This morning things were looking up. No snow on the ground, no snow in the air, just a frosted up windshield, but again good ol defrost took care of it. In fact at 10:00 this morning my car was totally red, no frost, no snow...just hope that the grey cloudy skies might go away.

But alas, that hope was to be dashed! The snow started again...lightly at first, but then it started to pick up steam, and this is what things looked like at 7pm. At 11pm when I watched the news they predicted another 10-20cm (4"-8") of snow overnight! WHAT!!??!?!?!? Doesn't Mother Nature know it is the middle of April?

This weather depresses me, and I was already depressed, so I didn't need this to make it worse! I'm trying to be happy for the farmer's and gardener's who can always use moisture in this area, but how about a few April shower's? This snow is just yucky and makes me want to turn right around and go back into my cave and hibernate for another month or two!

So please, if you have sunshine where you are, please, please send some our way...I am so sick of snow!!!

It's been a rough week....

Sometimes I can't believe that it's only been less than 5 months since my brother passed away. It seems like it's been so much longer than that since he was last sitting on my couch offering his brotherly advice, or telling a joke or trying to tickle Mercedes. Sometimes I miss him so much that it physically hurts me...I actually get a physical pain in my chest from missing him so much. And that is how this week has been.

I miss seeing him, talking to him, teasing him, listening to him, cooking for him, calling him, asking him for favors, doing him favors, just knowing that he was a couple doors away, needing him and him being there to be needed. I just miss him. But especially I miss talking to him. He really understood me. We were more than just brother and sister, we were great friends too. And I appreciated his perspective on things...he saw things in a way that made sense to me...in a way that I didn't always see them myself, but was always glad to be made aware of that perception. He loved to play devil's advocate. He was great at making sure that I really thought about all sides of things. I miss that. I miss so many things. I especially miss being able to give him a hug and tell him that I love him and he's a great brother.

So this week I've felt especially sad and I've had a hard time just functioning. It was kinda lucky cause Mercedes was on Easter break, so she was able to spend lots of time hanging out with her cousins and do some fun things with them. I am so lucky to live close to my family and be able to rely on them for help when I am not feeling well.

But due to the way I was feeling this week, I really didn't accomplish much. Unless you count crying and sleeping as accomplishments, then I definately didn't accomplish as much as I would have liked. I did manage to do a couple things though.

Last night though, I got the urge to do a LO. The picture isn't great since the right side is curled up a bit, but I was just in a hurry to get a picture taken so it will have to do. I wanted to do a layout about how fast Mercedes seems to be growing up, but I also mentioned a few things that she still likes to be "little" about. It was just when I saw this picture of her I just was struck with how grown up she looked and I knew that I needed to do a LO about this place she is at right now where she wants to be grown up, but there is still a part of her that likes to be little.

This was just a quickie bday card I made using some scraps that I had sitting on my desk.

This card is using stamps and paper from Close to my Heart and the actual card pattern is from the CTMH book Wishes which I just ordered and LOVE!!

Another card using CTMH products, and ideas. This card is pretty much a scraplift of one in the Spring idea book. Now I just need to make one for a boy so I'll have at least something for each in my stash!

And this is what gets me through all the hard times. My little princess! Here she is giving some love to some of her many Webkinz stuffies.

I hope these aren't too dark. I just got Photoshop Elements 8 and have been playing around with some of the actions that you can get, but sometimes I may get a little carried away...sorry?!

I think this is my favorite. I just love the expression on her face...it's a typical I'm happy and content look that she gets when she is...well, happy and content. Boy, I love this little girl! And she loves her Webkinz! lol

Lots and lots of gift tags....

Sometimes after making lots of cards I'm left with a big pile of scraps. Pieces that are too big to throw away, but not quite big enough to really make more cards with, so that is when the time has come to go on a gift tag making spree! And that is what I did the last couple nights.

Besides I've been feeling a little down the last couple days so gift tags are the perfect project to work on...quick and easy with little brain power needed. Plus instant gratification of accomplishing something, since I certainly have not been accomplishing anything as far as my housework duties are concerned!

I'm not sure what has brought on these last couple days of the blues, but I have been really missing my brother...it kinda started on Sunday. Easter dinner just wasn't the same without him there, and it is April now which is his birthday month, so normally at this time of year he would be starting to tell us all what he wanted for his birthday and how we should all spend lots and lots of money on him because he is so awesome! He'd also be dropping absolutely not subtle hints that we should all take him to dinner at the Keg or at the very least cook him steak and lobster for dinner...and actually I probably would have this year cause he made me steak and crab legs for my birthday last year! It's hard to believe that it's only been four and a half months since he died, and yet in other ways it's seems like it's been forever since I last talked to him. I miss him so much.

And then it's been really windy down here these last few days and that always means a bad headache for me, so that hasn't improved my mood at all. But sometime today I am supposed to be getting some new stamps and paper that I ordered from Close to My Heart, so I'm hoping that will cheer me up and renew my spirit with some creative ideas! So keep checking in cause I will be doing some totally new card styles....I'm thinking of venturing into some new sizes, and shapes so keep your eyes peeled for those over the next few days!

So now for the gift tags I went crazy with over the last couple days. These are great for using up scraps. You just need a 2 7/8"x2 7/8" piece of cardstock then one piece of 1 1/4" x 2 3/4" patterned paper and a 2" x 2 1/4" piece of co-ordinating patterned paper. The white square is either 1 1/4" square or 1 1/2" square. And then this is just mounted on a 3"x3" card. Easy, peasy. Simple and great use for scraps. I also like to add a little embellishment in the top left corner just for a little something extra, and I use anything from a flower to a gem to a brad to a shell to whatever you have that would work.

So here's the pics....

Happy Easter

You would think that after making 100 boxes for my girlfriends wedding, and then 20 boxes for Mercedes' class I would be sick of making them, but I decided to make a few more for my mom & stepdad and then for my sister & her family. For these boxes I made the paper myself using glimmer mist since I was sick of plain white boxes! For the first 2 I used a Heidi Swapp mask and put it over the 2 sheets of paper and then sprayed the paper with pink, green and blue glimmer mist.

For all of these boxes I just picked 2 colors and either did stripes or dots to decorate the paper. I also added the little white paper topper with the deco edges just to jazz it up a bit, and instead of a scalloped circle this time, I used a deckled rectangle. Each box is filled with a bunch of different Easter chocolate candies. (My sister will be so thrilled that I got her kids all hopped up on sugar!) lol

This is just a simple no sentiment card with a cardstock heart on it. The patterned paper is all Martha Stewart stuff that I found in my scraps drawer.

This is one of my current favorite patterns....it was a mojo Monday sketch 126. If you're interested in actual sizes & pattern directions just post a comment and I will gladly post the measurements for any of the cards that I make.

This is a fairly quick and easy card. In fact the part that takes the longest is waiting for the glimmer mist on the flower to dry! Or actually just making the flower itself! lol

This is an old card pattern that I found as I was cleaning out a shelf in my old scrappy space. This year I'm in the process of slowly moving all my stuff from 2 rooms into one room...but the one room has to be emptied and cleaned out first, so it's all a very long and painful process. However when I can, I try to purge and re-organize and get like supplies together as much as possible. Anyways, as I was saying I found this box with card patterns that I used to use, before I started keeping them in binders and scribblers, so I decided to put all the patterns together and write all the patterns done in my scribbler. And I thought this was a great quick and easy card for those occasions when you need a card asap or when you want a card with clean lines.

This was another pattern I found in my box of patterns. This was fun too, cause I don't have any of this paper anymore so it was nice to get to work with it even if just for a few minutes!

Here is a 4 1/4" x 4 1/4" gate-fold card with matching envelope. These are so quick and easy to make if you have a scor-pal and they are a nice change from the regular 4 1/4" x 5 1/2" cards. I love the colors on this one too.

Just some quick little gift tags. These are so simple and quick to make, especially since you basically make 2 at once. You just need 2 pieces of patterned paper that go together, 2 squares of cardstock and 2 embellishments. Cut your pp 2 7/8"x 2 7/8"; Cut one of the pp squares in half diagonally. Ink all edges. Glue your backgrounds together (one diagonal on one whole square). Cut cardstock squares whatever size you need to "mat" your embellishment (usually 1 1/2"x 1 1/2" or 2 x 2 )

Another gift tag.

Now I'm off to Easter dinner at my sister's house. Have you ever noticed that food seems to taste better when you didn't have to cook it yourself? Well it does for me anyway (as long as the person who did cook it is a good cook, and my sister is!)

Not sure what we'll be doing later tonight....probably watching a movie since I have it on good authority that Mercedes got a couple movies from the Easter bunny (she hasn't been home to see her basket yet), and that means I'll be making more cards, cause I can't seem to just sit still and watch tv without doing something at the same time! lol

Hope you all have a great day and HAPPY EASTER!!